New-Mom-of-2 Strategy #4 - Wear Your Baby Well

Babywearing is trendy in some circles but is becoming more and more widespread and accepted in this country for its many benefits. With my first child I did make use of the Baby Bjorn and the Moby from time to time, mostly for walking outside for exercise or while shopping. Wearing my baby on my body was a good way to keep strangers in stores from touching my baby at will. I'm a slight germphobe.

The benefits of having my second attached to my body and having 2 free hands cannot be overstated. I'd say she spends at least 4 hours a day in the carrier. My older child is always on the move and this enables me to keep pace, or at least have a fighting chance to keep him in sight and yell really loudly to stop doing something life-threatening. In all seriousness, we homeschool and have a very active lifestyle, so being able to continue to engage in our daily activities is very important.

Wearing the baby on my body also enables me to keep up, to some degree, with housework. Not the heavy-duty deep cleaning, but the daily tidying and meal prep that enables all our lives to run relatively smoothly. The key is to be able to stay on top of the cleaning. I personally find it stressful to be in a cluttered environment and have noticed that it elevates the anxiety level of my first, so it is really important to maintain a tidy environment for the sake of all.

I haven't tried all the different devices and wraps out there. There are many. I like the Baby 
Bjorn for outdoor and vigorous activity. It also worked really well for my first-born as he was a big baby and I needed the additional back support the Bjorn offered. I do love the Moby Wrap, however for around the house and for running quick errands. It can stay on all day and the baby can be easily slipped in and out as needed. This is especially convenient when you need to get in and out of the car numerous times as it does not interfere with the seat belt.

So, research and try out different carriers, find a few that meet your needs, and strap that baby on!!!

New-Mom-of-2 Strategy #3 - Go Shopping!

First. If you are one of those women who did not look pregnant until 35 weeks and lost all your baby weight within 2 weeks postpardum, please keep this to yourself.  Those of us who were showing at 3 months and lost a grand total of 5 pounds after giving birth do not want to hear about your good genes. It's like listening to swimwear models casually discuss how they can eat whatever they want, never exercise, and have trouble keeping on enough weight. Really.

If you were not blessed with immediately losing all you pregnancy weight within a few weeks of giving birth, I know that you may be reluctant to go shopping to buy new clothes post-baby. But chances are your post-baby body is too small for your maternity clothes and too big for your non-pregnancy clothes. It seems "reasonable" to wait until you've lost the baby weight to buy new clothes. Perhaps you underestimate the length of time that it will take to lose the weight. (Rule of thumb is 9 months to put the weight on and 9 months for it to come off.) Perhaps you don't want to face the "new" body in full length mirrors. Perhaps you dread moving into "misses" or "plus sizes" even temporarily. Perhaps money is a concern. No matter the reason that you hesitate, get over it and get shopping. Wearing maternity clothes past the first few weeks postpardum can really get you down. Trying to squeeze into jeans 2 sizes too small and muffin-topping out of them? Bright side - yes you can fit in them. Down side - yes, it does look that bad.

This time around I got smarter. Instead of wearing pjs and sweats for months on end and wallowing in self-loathing, I went out and purchased a few basic items at Target. A few skirts with elastic waists and a few nice shirts that all coordinate with one another. They flatter my larger-than-normal figure, conceal the fact that I still look about 4 months pregnant so I can leave the house without my newborn and not fear being asked when the blessed date is, and will wear well as I do lose weight. Total cost was about $150. Well worth it to feel confident and look reasonably put-together. Can afford to spend a little more? Accessories! Can't afford quite that much? Goodwill Stores or consignment shops are another great place to get some low-priced wardrobe staples to wear while you downsize.

New-Mom-of-2 Strategy #2 - A Shower A Day...

I cannot stress enough the importance of feeling good about the way you look enhancing your experience as a new mom - or being a long-time mom with a new baby. Yes, you're exhausted. Yes, your patience is being tested. Yes, you are probably a few pounds above your "fighting weight." However, sitting around in sweats and your pair pulled into a ponytail and a baseball cap will do little for your confidence or self esteem. Do yourself a favor and take a shower once a day and put on a fresh set of clothes that you feel good about wearing. This sounds simple. However, coming from a mom who spent the first 3 months living in sweats or pjs following the birth of her first son, it is not always easy.

I have implemented the strategy of taking a shower first thing every morning before my husband leaves for work. That way I get 15 to 20 minutes in the bathroom alone to shower, moisturize, tweeze, and dress without having to attend to anyone else. It is wonderfully refreshing and allows me some high-premium quiet time to start my day. Starting the day out feeling clean and looking well-groomed does wonders for my attitude. I wouldn't think of going to work outside the home without doing these basic things. Why would they be less important working inside the home? This simple step in self-care is also setting a good example for your older kids. Additionally, this way if any plans change during the day and I need to leave the home unexpectedly, I'm prepared and look reasonable instead of having to slink around in a baseball cal and sunglasses and pray no one recognizes me. 

This leads me to tip #3 - go ahead and buy some new non-pregnancy clothes in the size you currently need. ...

New-Mom-of-2 Strategy #1 - The "Food Bag"

One thing I realized while my mom was visiting is that babies have an uncanny ability to be hungry at the same time as you. This is no doubt due to the intimacy once shared after being on your eating schedule for months in the womb. This can make getting your own meals prepped and eaten a challenge - not to mention when you must prep and serve meals to other children. This has been my experience as a breastfeeding mom in particular.

My strategy is to get "in front" of meals as best I can. Before my husband left for work this morning I got lunch and snacks prepped and loaded into a lunch bag for D. I placed it on the bottom shelf of the refrigerator and told him that when he gets hungry during the day, if I'm busy with his sister that I'll give him permission to get the bag and get out a snack or his lunch. All the food is "D-approved". He was really excited by this. Its 10:13am and he's already eaten 1 sandwich, a granola bar, and a yogurt. Yes, he ate breakfast this morning. I think he's having yet another growth spurt. He likes having choices and independence. This has really freed up my morning. I'll report in a week to tell how it is going!

Getting Back Into the Swing of Things

After almost 3 months off from blogging and giving birth to #2 - I'm happy to report that I'm getting back into the swing of things, beginning to establish a routine, and am beginning to formulate blogs in my head again. It is just working out the precious time to get them down in writing that is a challenge.

Proud to introduce our newest addition - S. Meghan!
What are the odds of having 2 children born 4 years apart to the day? I can't decide if having the same birthday will be a blessing or a curse. I guess I'll find out soon! She was born at home, 18" and 6 lbs 10 oz. We are so blessed. She is a gift from God!

Excited about Birds!

With spring fast approaching, the birds are returning!

Over the winter, our family made bird feeders together one Sunday afternoon and hung them out on our deck. For many weeks, we didn't see any birds. However, over the past 2 or 3 weeks, we've begun to see them! We've had chickadees perched on the bird feeders and have seen blue jays as well. We've heard woodpeckers as well!

We found a great website All About Birds.  It has a vast library of photos, videos, live-cameras, and audio clips of their different calls and songs. We spent some time the day we made the feeders surfing the site looking at birds that we'd be likely to find locally and that our type of birdseed would attract. D loved listening to and imitating the calls and songs.

At first D would get so excited to see a bird on the deck that he'd make so much noise it would fly away. Now he will put his finger to his lips and creep up to the glass door and peer intently at the bird with a big smile on his face.

I've been reading up a lot lately on Charlotte Mason Homeschool Education. One of the key aspects of her method is the use of "living" or "great" books - those that has stood the test of time and engage the reader's entire being. She emphasizes the use of living books rather than text books for learning of all subjects. Of the many aspects of her method that resonate with me, I love the time and energy put into nature study, both formal and informal. It is something that D and I already do and we love. So, I found some great books that will supplement our outdoors study and play this season.

The Burgess Bird Book for Children, by Thornton W. Burgess arrived today.  It was originally written in 1919. The illustrations are wonderfully detailed. I am already in love with this book. We'll see how D responds to it. It is a fine example of a living book. It is a work of literature presenting naturalist study of birds of the Northeastern US through a compelling story. It presents scientific information through a story featuring Peter Rabbit - yes - as in Beatrix Potter - and his interactions with the bird world. This is wonderful because we also just started to read the books of Beatrix Potter as recommended by many Charlotte Mason curriculum sources as being excellent living books to help expand both children's imagination and vocabularies. My mother read them to me as a child and now I'm sharing them with my son. I remember being completely enchanted as a child. D was equally engaged with the characters and the storyline. ( I digress, but was amazed at the level of vocabulary in The Tale of Benjamin Bunny as compared to contemporary children's literature that we've been reading until now. It opened my eyed to how "flattened" the vocabulary of many books written for children today is and gave me a new appreciation for the true classic books.)

I look forward to sharing the chapter 37, "Farwells and Welcomes - The Chickadee" with D tomorrow.

So, our next step will be to incorporate nature journals in the next few weeks to start recording our observations. You'll soon find out how that goes!

Getting Well and the Humbling of a Mom

Well, it is 8:30am on Wednesday. I am the only one awake. Including the cats and dog. Is this homeschooling?

Yes. Particularly when mom, the primary guide, is sick. And when the whole family has been ill for the past 3 weeks.

I have set aside any formal lessons for the past 2 and a half weeks. While I realize this is an advantage to homeschooling, it is also making me very antsy. I recall the on-line Heart of the Matter Homeschool Refresher from last week. A wonderful speaker reminded all of us that it is not "us" that homeschool, but rather we are the instruments through which God educates and communicates with our children and our families. She encouraged us all to check in with God and invite him into all aspects of our lives, including our homeschool, and seek His wisdom.

To say I've been stressed out is an understatement. Having a sick child and sick spouse at home during the busiest month of the year for me, and then getting sick myself was trying. Knowing that many people depended on me to perform and produce caused a deep and ongoing anxiety that I'm sure contributed to this latest round of illness for me.

During my time of bible study yesterday, I heard my inner voice, the small voice inside me that I know to be God, say to me, among other things, "Pull back and stay home. You're needed here. You've been in the world and now you're needed home." I prayed for guidance in what I should be putting my energy into right now. I received that it is okay to let go of the lessons, the yoga classes and the community service work for a while and focus on getting everyone back to a baseline of health and our home back in order. But first, I must take the next 2 weeks to fully allow myself the space, time, and internal peace to heal and prepare the way for a very special little girl who will be coming to live with us in just 2 short months.

It is very hard for me to let go of a well laid plan. It is very hard to pull back and let others take over and moreover to let others take care of me. I think many moms can relate. It is a lesson in humility for me, a letting go of my discipline and will, which often serves me well in life. It is also a surrender of pride. I wish a lesson in humility and pride were a one time thing. For me, at least, it seems I keep revisiting it and reviewing it. While God did not cause this series of illnesses to sweep my household, I do believe that He is using this as a lesson in letting go and letting Him work in all our lives.

In You, O Lord, do I put my trust. (Psalm 31:1)